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jynx_tsilevonSupposedly.
Dad called me after ...
I'm gonna stop calling him dad. For the rest of this, he is Sir. And that, if you're reading this, is to be said sarcastically.
So after three days, and me ignoring (or just missing on accident, let's be honest), about six phone calls from him, Sir finally got ahold of me.
Awkward small chat began (My grandpa is getting remarried! That's...actually kind of weird but I'm happy for him).
And then we started talking. Honestly I'm already blocking out the conversation. But a few things were made really clear to me.
1) Communication has broken down completely between me and Sir. I was sure that I told him that I was still looking for internships or something (the importance here is the OR SOMETHING) that would keep me from coming back. He heard the "internships" but not the OR SOMETHING.
2) Because he did not hear the OR SOMETHING, I never said it.
3) Therefore I am a liar.
4) There's a car here that's going to cost me about 2000 dollars despite the fact that it won't be mine.
5) Regardless of anything Sir says, this is totally about money.
To be frank, I don't remember what I said exactly over the last couple months. But I am pretty sure I made it clear in either my tone, words, actions, or all three, that I was looking quite constantly for anything that wasn't go back to that place with Sir.
Sir bought a car. For me to use (under the condition that I live there). That is fine, I guess. But now I'm not living there. And I don't think I ever really want to go back. So I won't.
Car still is bought. Apparently it was one of those fix-me-up ones, since he bought parts for it. Didn't know about the parts till today. Just about the car.
I also am apparently legally bound to make him even since he's spent "three weeks" and "thousands of dollars" looking for this car I'm not going to (or be allowed to?) use. I think he meant morally bound? I didn't sign any contracts. Either way, I'm not really bound, but I doubt I'm getting out of paying him.
(Whitemage, I did ask him if I could have the car over the summer despite living near you. He ignored the question.)
I know all of that above there sounds like whining, but here's where the real stinger comes from the argument and when I actually get miffed.
According to Sir, I am not allowed to be independent until I am in the working world (At the age 26, he has decided. I don't know where he got that number). The only number I knew about was that, when I was 23, I would have sole access to whatever was left in my trust fund. So nothing, but that is beside the point.
I must be declared by the State that I am emancipated, and that makes me independent. I just looked that up, and he's wrong as shit. I'm legally an adult, so that automatically emancipates me! Whooo!
Now to be able to claim independence on my taxes is something else. I think I'll be able to do that next tax year? I am not sure.
Anyway
He says because I am not independent I have to use other people to support me. Because of this, I should not be ruining my relationship with him because he's supporting me.
I told him, point blank, that if I had to be supported by other people, then I was going to look for those other people because I didn't want to be supported by him.
Sir was so hurt.
He told me that no child treats their parents as I do. I am so self entitled. What person actually thinks that they can have their parents money with no strings attached? (I did ask him why everything I did with him came with strings attached, and that was the response).
He told me that I owe him respect. I told him no, I don't.
He hung up on me.
I may be a bit entitled. I believed I was entitled to having caring parents who'd support me in my decisions. I didn't care if they supported me financially. I am okay being broke as shit.
He's also entitled, thinking I owe him something. Yeah, he raised me, but I'm learning quickly that that only means something if you raise your children with respect. I would respect you, Sir, if you respected me.
I told him about the independency thing. He texted me just now that I need to file my taxes, fill out my FAFSA, and clear up the issue with the scholarship office (I have an instate scholarship that keeps getting removed because Sir claims me as a dependent every year). I'm confused now because my tax returns have already come back, or one of them has...so I don't know why I need to file my taxes? And the FAFSA has already been submit...so why do I need to do that? The scholarship one makes sense, since the issue is still there, but up till now he's held all the information.
I hate to ask this, but since I'm "dependent" and "need support," I'm looking up loans. Any hints and advice how to do this?
Dad called me after ...
I'm gonna stop calling him dad. For the rest of this, he is Sir. And that, if you're reading this, is to be said sarcastically.
So after three days, and me ignoring (or just missing on accident, let's be honest), about six phone calls from him, Sir finally got ahold of me.
Awkward small chat began (My grandpa is getting remarried! That's...actually kind of weird but I'm happy for him).
And then we started talking. Honestly I'm already blocking out the conversation. But a few things were made really clear to me.
1) Communication has broken down completely between me and Sir. I was sure that I told him that I was still looking for internships or something (the importance here is the OR SOMETHING) that would keep me from coming back. He heard the "internships" but not the OR SOMETHING.
2) Because he did not hear the OR SOMETHING, I never said it.
3) Therefore I am a liar.
4) There's a car here that's going to cost me about 2000 dollars despite the fact that it won't be mine.
5) Regardless of anything Sir says, this is totally about money.
To be frank, I don't remember what I said exactly over the last couple months. But I am pretty sure I made it clear in either my tone, words, actions, or all three, that I was looking quite constantly for anything that wasn't go back to that place with Sir.
Sir bought a car. For me to use (under the condition that I live there). That is fine, I guess. But now I'm not living there. And I don't think I ever really want to go back. So I won't.
Car still is bought. Apparently it was one of those fix-me-up ones, since he bought parts for it. Didn't know about the parts till today. Just about the car.
I also am apparently legally bound to make him even since he's spent "three weeks" and "thousands of dollars" looking for this car I'm not going to (or be allowed to?) use. I think he meant morally bound? I didn't sign any contracts. Either way, I'm not really bound, but I doubt I'm getting out of paying him.
(Whitemage, I did ask him if I could have the car over the summer despite living near you. He ignored the question.)
I know all of that above there sounds like whining, but here's where the real stinger comes from the argument and when I actually get miffed.
According to Sir, I am not allowed to be independent until I am in the working world (At the age 26, he has decided. I don't know where he got that number). The only number I knew about was that, when I was 23, I would have sole access to whatever was left in my trust fund. So nothing, but that is beside the point.
I must be declared by the State that I am emancipated, and that makes me independent. I just looked that up, and he's wrong as shit. I'm legally an adult, so that automatically emancipates me! Whooo!
Now to be able to claim independence on my taxes is something else. I think I'll be able to do that next tax year? I am not sure.
Anyway
He says because I am not independent I have to use other people to support me. Because of this, I should not be ruining my relationship with him because he's supporting me.
I told him, point blank, that if I had to be supported by other people, then I was going to look for those other people because I didn't want to be supported by him.
Sir was so hurt.
He told me that no child treats their parents as I do. I am so self entitled. What person actually thinks that they can have their parents money with no strings attached? (I did ask him why everything I did with him came with strings attached, and that was the response).
He told me that I owe him respect. I told him no, I don't.
He hung up on me.
I may be a bit entitled. I believed I was entitled to having caring parents who'd support me in my decisions. I didn't care if they supported me financially. I am okay being broke as shit.
He's also entitled, thinking I owe him something. Yeah, he raised me, but I'm learning quickly that that only means something if you raise your children with respect. I would respect you, Sir, if you respected me.
I told him about the independency thing. He texted me just now that I need to file my taxes, fill out my FAFSA, and clear up the issue with the scholarship office (I have an instate scholarship that keeps getting removed because Sir claims me as a dependent every year). I'm confused now because my tax returns have already come back, or one of them has...so I don't know why I need to file my taxes? And the FAFSA has already been submit...so why do I need to do that? The scholarship one makes sense, since the issue is still there, but up till now he's held all the information.
I hate to ask this, but since I'm "dependent" and "need support," I'm looking up loans. Any hints and advice how to do this?
no subject
Date: 2013-03-17 09:50 pm (UTC)Talk to Drak about loan business, she knows a hell of a lot more about it than I do. We'll get it sorted out. He's probably trying to make you panic when he mentions it, though. Honestly just ignore any commands or orders of his.
It will be a good summer. You will be alright. We've got this.